We were rippin’ and a tearin’ through this special two-hour edition of The Five Count. The first hour was made up of the typical hilarious fare, including a recount of Ton’s days as The Rocketeer and a heated discussion about who would be eaten first in the event of a zombie apocalypse. The bonus hour featured a special broadcast of the E.T. The Extra Terrestrial storybook, narrated by the one and only Michael Jackson. Southern Minnesota (and Ton especially) were brought to tears by this emotional tale. What better way to spend a Labor Day weekend?
This was the special “Ton’s Birthday Blowout” edition of the show. During the show we jammed out to Ton’s favorite songs, chatted about the metric system with a woman who called from China, and received a call from Ton’s arch-nemesis, Killoton, who unsuccessfully tried to thwart Ton’s birthday boogieing. For his birthday, Dustin gave Ton a brand new Motley Crue pencil pouch!
This installment of The Five Count was Ton’s special birthday tribute to his mother. During the show Ton played all his mother’s favorite songs, shared stories about growing up and hanging out in beauty parlors, we discussed the pros and cons of Teddy Ruxpin, and Dustin tried hard to find a way to marry into Ton’s family. Love is in the air!
This was our special “Tribute to America” show featuring the music of America’s greatest export, Rocky IV. During the show we quoted our favorite lines from the film, Ton broke out into his own training montage, and we explained why we think the True Punks should be considered amongst the “Founding Fathers” of our country. Yo, Southern Minnesota! We did it!
This was a special Father’s Day edition of The Five Count. In honor of fathers everywhere, we played the music of everyone’s favorite fatherly troubadour, Burl Ives. During the show we discussed Burl’s comeback into the mainstream, Ton talked about punching bears in the face, and Dustin shared stories about growing up with his father, Wayne Newton. Another great Father’s Day in the books. Grab your pops!
Artwork by Nora Myers of The Dirty Birds
This was the special “Six Years of Five Count” anniversary show. It was a star-studded affair, complete with a live performance by The Five Count House Band. During the show we discussed the amazing fact that we’re still on the air after six years and chatted on the phone with our old friends Vomix, Randy “Macho Man” Savage, and Al’s mom. When not hobnobbing with all our adoring fans, the house band ripped through many of today’s biggest hits, including a heart-warming (and shirtless) rendition of George Michael’s Careless Whisper!
The Five Count House Band (L to R: Al Carlson, Dustin Wilmes, Juston “Ton” Cline)
The Five Count’s anniversary is coming up fast, so we’ve decided (against our better judgement) to open up the vaults and dig up the very first episode of The Five Count. The show took place on June 12, 2004. Technical difficulties kept anyone from hearing it properly because the program affectionately known as Overnight Jazz played over the top of it. That’s what happens when you don’t do shows live at KMSU. During the show we discussed the origins of the show, told stories about the dangers of riding the bus, and basically stumbled over words and fumbled with the controls the whole time. It was a mess!
Photo by Amanda Donkers & Pants by Ashley Birk
This was our special Mother’s Day edition of The Five Count. During the show we sang praises to mothers all over Southern Minnesota, tried to set Ton up with any single mothers in the audience, and gushed over The Five Count House Band‘s recent appearance in the Mankato Free Press. Check out the photo below. The show is lacking in sound quality thanks to faulty KMSU equipment!
The Five Count House Band (L to R: Juston “Ton” Cline, Al Carlson, Dustin Wilmes)
This was the 300th broadcast of The Five Count! We went Over the Top and celebrated by playing the entire soundtrack from the aforementioned cinema masterpiece. During the show we dissed all the naysayers who said we’d never make it, discussed the pros and cons of taking helicopter rides with Juggalos, and arm wrestled each other until we passed out. The world might not meet you halfway, but you can still listen to the show!