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This was the 300th broadcast of The Five Count! We went Over the Top and celebrated by playing the entire soundtrack from the aforementioned cinema masterpiece. During the show we dissed all the naysayers who said we’d never make it, discussed the pros and cons of taking helicopter rides with Juggalos, and arm wrestled each other until we passed out….

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This was a special Easter edition of The Five Count. During the show we tried to lure today’s questionable youth away from the dangers of rock music with help from the Church Universal and Triumphant. We also begged for pledge dollars and broke the news that Ton had died and descended into Hell. Hopefully, on the 300th show (next week)…

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During this installment of The Five Count we talked about throwing knives at furniture, reminisced about Ton using semi-automatic weapons to destroy Dustin’s cherished childhood keepsakes, and discussed the art of crossbow warfare with a cab driver. It was an unnecessarily hostile show. Get caught up in the crossfire below… [Audio clip: view full post to listen] Check The Playlist

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This installment of The Five Count featured a heaping mess of ridiculous. During the show we shared stories about Ton’s career as a matador, briefly considered a career as cage fighters, and Ton reprimanded a caller in a Cajun-like fashion. The rest of the show was spent discussing different ways to style chest hair. Listen again here… [Audio clip: view…

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This edition of The Five Count was our special “Tribute to Troma” show, featuring an exclusive interview with the President of Troma Entertainment and Creator of The Toxic Avenger, Lloyd Kaufman. Lloyd is a world-renowned director, producer, actor, author, and has championed the cause of independent media for more than 30 years. During the show we talked to Lloyd about…

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Even though the funk dust has settled, The Five Count is back with a vengeance for this exciting installment. During the show we gave a caller some advice on how to impress his dates and rock the box, warned dorm residents about the dangers of babies having babies, and Ton explained what it takes to be the sauce boss. Get…

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This edition of The Five Count was the final installment of our month-long “Funkuary” shows. During the show we got real sweaty while gettin’ down, recounted Ton’s recent date with KMSU’s Ms. Lona, and shared stories about the days at Studio 55-Count (which was just like Studio 54, only it was in Ton’s bedroom.) Ain’t nothin’ to it but to…

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After a week-long furlough, we returned with another installment of “Funkuary” on The Five Count. During the show we discussed the logistics of having our own backing-band follow us around, tried to set up Ton with the girl who works at the pretzel hut in the mall, and we planned a trip to the beach. We also changed the name…

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This was the first installment of our “Funkuary” series, The Five Count’s month-long dedication to the funk. During the show we busted out on the funk, gave shout-outs to a deathbed-ridden Ton, and Dustin’s grandma called in to discuss embroidery floss. It don’t get much funkier than that! Get down here… [Audio clip: view full post to listen] Check The…

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We celebrated Princemas for this edition of The Five Count. During the show we discussed all the reasons why Prince is so great, told the story of how Prince gave Ton his name, and thwarted the sophomoric efforts of the Princemas Grinch, a/k/a The Dirty Birds. Several rugs were defaced during the making of this show. Pay homage here… [Audio…